A guide for parents going through divorce
Divorce is not easy for anyone. Breaking of a marriage, for any reason, can be a very hard thing to do. There are long term consequences and effects to any divorce. But these effects are not just limited to the spouses. Family members, especially children, are also largely affected by the breaking up of a marriage. As parents, it becomes important for us to make sure that are children are able to go through this process without feeling damaged. Here are some points that you should keep in mind that will make the process of divorce easier for your kids –
- Give your child loads of love –
First of all, you need to make sure that your child feels loved. The process of divorce is hard and your children will experience it firsthand. Children tend to feel that the reason why one of their parents is leaving them is because he/she doesn’t love them. As a parent, it is essential that you shower your children with love and make them understand that whatever that is happening is not their fault.
- Don’t sugarcoat –
As difficult as it would seem like, being real with your child and not sugarcoating the situation is actually a very healthy thing to do. Do not make excuses for your spouse. Doing so inhibits your child’s ability to express his feelings properly. Let your child vent out his anger and disappointment without you making excuses or apologizing for the absent parent.
- Encourage communication –
It is very important for you to let your child communicate with you and your ex about his/her feelings. If your child feels that you or the other parent is not doing enough to stay in touch, then he/she should be allowed to communicate that. Not only will this help your child vent out all of his feelings, but this will also help you and your ex become aware of things that you need to improve on.
- Get others involved –
For a child, the effects of divorce are long term. The presence of two reliable and caring people in his life gets reduced to one. Because of this, it is advisable to have the presence of other reliable adults in your child’s life. Other loving and devoted family members, such as grandparents, and close friends prove to be great role models that your child can depend on for emotional support. This will also make things easier for you in the long run.
- NEVER fight in front of your kids –
This is perhaps the most simple and obvious rule to follow, but yet people keep breaking this rule all the time. There should be no excuse for fighting in front of your kids. Any conversations regarding unreliability, unfaithfulness or finances should take place on the phone when your kids are not around to witness it. Fighting in front of them will create a negative atmosphere and will make your kids feel unsafe. At justdivorcemedationi.co.uk, our mediators will make sure that your children are not negatively affected by your divorce.